Backlogged Blog

I have been pretty busy making power points and outlines about this:


and this:


So much so, that i almost forgot about this:



Hopefully these folks will open a franchise in Fontana:


We got to the hugest flag ever flown via this:

And we had to sleep in this: Room for 2? NO....


Room for 4!


Things are really weird on cruise ships:


I think i slept with this guy one day (i slept mostly during the day and hunted for miscrients during the night hours)


The signage in Mexico was really odd too:


And nobody told me about the prom dresses. At least i had enough time to fix my hair.

I Taught a Spin Class This Morning...

I wonder what MF and MF were doing...

Going for a stupid boat ride

I will be busy for a few days. i wont be answering the phone, emailing anyone, checking anyones blog or even communicating with family to see if Sister Julene's little girl is born - she's is due like last week or something.

I am chaperoning, that's right, the senior class and a ton of their parents on a Royal Caribbean Cruise.

My goals, in no specific order of importance:
1. Make sure the parents stay in line and on task
2. Step AWAY from the buffet
3. Attempt to stay awake for the 1-2am curfews
4. At least walk by the gym. i heard they have really nice spin bikes. i packed my shoes and shorts. pffff.
5. work on my tan. it is Mexico you know...
6. Stay in my room as much as possible. i think i might get sick.

Other than that my weekend looks pretty bland. Your's will probably be way more exciting...

If I Could Master the Round House Kick...

Some people would get my foot up-side their head about right now

A few, but of course not limited to, individuals that need a swift kick in the jaw will remain un-named, yet their short comings will be sighted.

At a recent JR. HIGH girl's basketball tournament, we lost by ONE point. A coach from another team came up to me and said "Way to let that one slip by coach." And bam, in my head, heal to the jaw.

Number two happened approximately the next day. At the same tournament. We lost. 40-7. What! They got a great cardio blast. The opposing coach, while thoughtfully shaking my hand said "Don't worry coach, you have the rest of the season."

Pff. I have the rest of the season to watch Jackie Chan movies and perfect my moves.

Recovery. Pfff.

Had my first Pro Mountain Bike race today! Had an excellent cool down, pizza and a soda, sat in the UN-hot hot tub for some cold therapy and should have called it a day.

But duty called, to a fundraiser Basketball game at work. Students vs. Faculty.

12 minute quarters. Freshman first quarter, working our way up to the seniors. Now we were allowed to have spouses play, and some of the ladies have married well, so they brought their Athlete Ringer husbands. But we had to have a girl on the court at all times. there were 4 of us lady folk, so i had to play.



Yup. thats me in the red shorts. We are playing the Seniors here, and they have no mercy. I am their class sponsor, and Friday we set sail on a Cruise Ship for Ensenada.

Unlike the English Teacher to on the right, i am NOT wearing white compression shorts. Thats my tan.

I have no idea where the ball was. It must have just been there.

That boy hurlding me, well, his giant knee brace tagged my melon and he stepped on my arm. Thats right, i have treads on my bicep.

its Midnight, my dad used to tell me nothing good happened past 10 pm, so i best be goin' to bed!

Why i am Not Allowed to Race Road Until the Fall

If even then...

In the Midst of a Dreary Day...

I was grading HEALTH tests for 9th graders, over Stress MAnagement. I am so not qualified to teach that chapter...

One essay question stated: Name three stress management techniques you use and explain why you find them helpful.

ANSWER from Kid A: "I go to a quiet place and imagine myself being a superhero in my imaginary world. Then i feel better."
Awesome. Completely, awesome.

I did Two Stupid things, off the top of my head

1. went out for a cold ride without a vest
2. Gave my email address out in public. Since my last name is nearly impossible to spell right, and Jeff Padgette has some women's crit photos of girls going down in a big way, he said he would send them to my hotmail account. As i rattled off the address, i looked out of the corner of my eye. And there, at the window, was the LURKER, you know who i mean. That's right. He's got my email address. I have had it since 1998, but i may have to change it. Tonight.

Balla' shot calla'

We all have our secrets

You are probably wondering what mine are. How much time do you have?

A. i eat a TON of candy
1. Anything Reese's
2. Anything sour
3. Anything sugary
4. Just like Elf, the main food groups - Sugar, candy corns....

B. I play(ed) basketball
1. I played in college, thats right. 4 years, NAIA Div II, sorta like NCAA Div II
2. I haven't really played in like, um, 4 years
3. i coached high school, but retired
4. Now i coach Jr High. i am losing my voice.

C. I look like Teen Wolf...

So on this basketball tangent. I joined an all-girls league. Nothing weird. I seem like an old hag on the team, im 28, they are like 20. But i can run hot laps around them cardio-wise. But what i have in cardio, i surely lack in talent. I keep trying to call "glass" or get an "and-1", but no dice. I do get the ball in the hole, don't get me wrong, im just not as proficient as i used to be.

They look at me weird sometimes, because i have a lot of energy. Also, my mouth runs constantly. The team we played tonight, my cousin Melissa is on it. I said terrible things to her, smacked her hiney, and got away with it. Im older than her.

Last week the other team boasted TWO of my previous teammates! Nasty things were said like "WHy do you have the ball, you cant dribble." And "You couldnt make that shot when you actually played ball, why try now." and the basics like "i am faster than you, you chump." Or "don't touch me *X@(#&!"

Next week we are playing an old college roommate of mine. She barely cracks 5 feet. i am going to guard her the whole time and talk about horrible college and high school mishaps. All hers of course.

i also either have to wear cycling shorts, which i have opted out of, my PE teaching shorts which i could wear while directing the Disney Safari Ride, or my practice shorts from college. They are XXL. Because we were Ballas', we wore them big. Plus, i was big(er).

They made fun of my tan lines.

Biscuits.

One girl told me my hair looked like Teen Wolf. I put a lot of product in it. I run real fast. I sweet a lot. It sticks out.

Check it.


Now that i see it, i just don't "see" it. i know i am due a brow wax, but come on.

I thought it looked more like this:

Maybe i will post something tomorrow...

But until then, rest your eyes on this:




My new ride
21.2 lbs
Don't hate

Guilty Pleasures

I only like the original cast and the high school years.

I have been teaching Paige all the names of the cast, who is dating who, what will go down so that they won't be dating later and who they swith to. pretty entertaining stuff. i am amazed at how much i know about the show, for never being allowed to actually watch the show at home.

oh yes, i can watch this all day because, that's right, its another sick day.

"Why Joy Is Bad For You"

While surfing the net due to a horrific illness that caused me to call in a substitute today, using one of my coveted 10 sick days for the year, i found some shocking things. This however, is atrocious. JOY, happiness, and having a moderately good life, are bad for you.

A study suggests extreme happiness may be bad for you. Findings: 1) "The highest levels of income, education and political participation were reported not by the most satisfied individuals, but by moderately satisfied individuals." 2) Extremely happy people "earned significantly less money" and earned lower school grades than moderately happy people. 3) They "may not live as long," either. Theories: 1) Happiness makes you complacent and kills your drive. 2) It makes you slow to adapt. 3) It makes you too optimistic and insufficiently vigilant about your health. 4) It may overstimulate your cardiovascular system. Researchers' conclusions: 1) "Happiness may need to be moderated for success." 2) "Extremely high levels of happiness might not be a desirable goal." Human Nature's conclusions: 1) Success may need to be moderated for happiness. 2) Extremely high levels of success might not be a desirable goal.

This is ridiculous. good thing i am depressed, angry, motivated to take over the world all of which means like life is lacking a lot of JOY.

confessions of a post-teenage drama queen

I HAVE A CRUSH



Tuesday Nights, 8pm...
The Biggest Loser
check it...

what is this, a booby trap!!!?

DATA aka Jonathan Ke Quan, pictured here in "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom" and quoted from, like, the best teen drama EVER, "Goonies"

Stef: Data where are you going?
Data: I'm setting booty traps.
Stef: You mean booby traps?
Data: THATS WHAT I SAID! BOOBY TRAPS! God. These Guys!

It seems that whenever i come to work on a holiday, some form of booby trap has been set. What gives man? I resent who ever and why ever these "things" if you can call them that, keep ending up in front of my stable door.

Christmas break found a ton of giant wooden black boxes blocking my path.



MLK day, today, i found giant signs, in even more giant cardboard contraptions, blocking. The only way in was to squeeze by the home and school recycle bins which get filled with things that are perishable and not recyclable.

Im over it. i am just going to surf the net, download music, and keep on bloggin.




I FOUND THIS AT WORK TOO:


They call it the Senior Rock. Kids get to paint it with pride blah blah blah. it just ends up looking like paint ball fodder and i think it is funny. some of my teaching allies, don't. We have spent about 68 minutes worth of meeting time discussing paint type, paint color, paint legibility, the times of the day when paint may be applies or removed, who in fact can do the applying and removing, and whether or not it should be sand blasted and rendered untouchable. once again, i think it is funny. Maybe that's why this stuff keeps ending up in front of my door...

OH COME ON:

I bought a new camera. i got a polaroid, with the ASSUMPTION that ALL pictures would come out in those nifty squares that youshake, shake it like a polaroid... but NO!!! Digital! What is this, the 2000's? There isn't even an OPTION for the shaker kinds. No choice at all! And, i can't seem to be smart enough to get the date off the pictures, which is the wrong date anyway!

Just because: there is an iTunes Free Down load, doesn't mean you have to take it. it is usually really bad and there is a reason it is free and all the others are $0.99 plus tax.

Just Because: iTunes makes you a list of songs, Just for You, doesn't mean you have to buy them, for $0.99 plus tax. Top of my list today: Bodies by Drowning Pool, Album SINNER. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE and how have they found me!!! i hope my mom doesn't see my list.

Oh, i totally forgot: I'm like an athlete, so trick this, i'm gonna go ride my bike!

Why my Job is Way Funnier Than Yours

"Dear Coach Dee,

(KID A) Has a banquet tonight. Please excuse her from all physical activity so that she does not mess up her hair. I curled it. Thank you."

Signed: MOM"

Duerksen Fit Camp 2008

"What is this, some sort of fit camp?" Whined Matt as Jeremy and i planned our adventures while everyone else worked.

Jeremy, the brother from Boulder, came to the IE for a bit of "down time." I so tricked him. We had a plethora of bikes to fit him on, free gym use, and list of honey-do's that i just didn't want to do on my own.

DAY ONE: Sent us to the gym where i teach spin for a 5:45am session. I tricked him on this one too. I told him the time, just not AM. After that, we did our circuit weights and headed to the hills for some mountain biking.

Not without a little trouble though. I seemed to find some mud. Pfff.


I won this stage.

Being from Boulder, he arrived with a bit a TUDE in regards to the Empire and our cycling options, but was soon smitten with the snow capped "peaks", clean air, and the accessability to trails from the front door!


DAY TWO: That's right, short sleeves, sweat on the brow, its January 4! This trek lasted just under 4 hours, hit 3 trail systems, and bit of pavement between.


Secret Trail Head: Although i have been told that training is no longer allowed to be called Covert (Items that fall under covert would be: Binge eating; lounging on the couch; not shaving the legs; ice cream or something silly like Tae BO)
BUT, some trail locations just CAN NOT be divulged on the NET! I won this stage too, but only because i knew the way, and riding through the Wash can be dicey between the rocks, TV's with bullet holes, and low-laying shrubs.



DAY THREE: Found us on the road with Adam where Jeremy realize we boast more rideable hill climbs than Boulder. You can only tell people SO many times, then you just have to show them! This was a neutral stage, yesterday Jeremy came to the conclusion he had lost his high altitude moxie, thus was feeling a bit winded.

DAY FOUR: Hampered by strong winds, a deluge of rain, and severely low temps (47 degrees) we decided to skip the Saturday Morning Road Championships and waited till the rain dwindled to a sprinkle and rolled out on the MTB's.

This was a funny day. Jeremy SAYS he raced a Boulder Cross race in 13 degrees, Fahrenheit. It was 50 out and he didn't want to go because it was cold. He put SO many layers on, i thought he was on a mountaineering expedition on Mt. Hood.

As soon as we rolled, he started to sweat.

Since it was the weekend, we invited friends.

Shelli and Matt were very happy to oblige.

Here is a photo of them riding, in the midst of the Worst Storm in Three Years. Pfff.


For this stage, we broke into divisions. Girls, and Boys. I think Matt won, or just rode away without us.


Perhaps next year will have an early camp so the trails in the mountains can be checked out and weather will be clear for a nice big group road ride.

Perhaps next year you can get an invite. or the call up. there is always wishful thinking...

So They Say

My hair has grown again. Now i look like Tina Turner. If only i could get a set of those legs too...

Hot or Not

Remember that show with Lorenzo Llamas, where contestants would come out onto the stage, scantily clad, and he would judge them. He would use one of those laser pointers, highlighting their high lights and more frequently their low lights. The group would be thinned down to the one contestant that was Hot, or the hottest, and the others were Not.

That's how i look back at 2007.

HOT or NOT

1. Forgetting my HELMET for day two of the San Dimas Stage Race: NOT
2. Finishing second in a few national mountain bike race, and winning a few too: Super HOT
3. Moving out of the mountains: HOT - literally
4. Getting my own office at work: HOT HOT HOT
5. Having a 16 year old non-sister: HOT, not, NOT, Hot, hot, NOT, NOT - you get the picture...
6. Giving my bike back: NOT
7. Getting my super cool 69er: HOT!
8. Racing the 12 HRS of Temecula: NOT
9. Racing the 12 HRS of Temecula: HOT
10. Getting massage certificates: HOT
11. Donating my pets to the greater good of some other homes: Super NOT
12. Going to Grandma's 94th birthday party: HOT
13. Watching reality TV with the Johnsons: HOT
14. Minimizing my life into a bedroom and storage unit: HOT
15. Taking the year off from Graduate School: THe best HOT ever
16. Coaching Jr. High volleyball: HOT - surprised you on that one!!
17. Traveling to UT, VT, AZ, CO with Matt, Christie and sometimes Trevor: HOT
18. Sitting in the AZ sun for HOURS: NOT
19. Racing in VT mud, slipping, sliding, flailing: Shockingly HOT (worst national race finish this year! It was so much fun!!!)
20. Getting my PRO upgrade, and Shelli getting her EXPERT upgrade: HOT
21. Getting SHELLI back on the Bike!!!: HOT
22. My new hair cut: HOT
23. The Johnsons, period: HOT
24. Laying on my floor: HOT
25. "Picking up" Running: NOT
26. Family trip to Aspen: HOT
27. Training on the road: NOT
28. Getting new front teeth, for the third time: NOT
29. Falling with my bike at a water fountain: NOT
30. Being able to ride out of the garage on my road bike or mountain bike and be entertained for hours on end: HOT

50 would be too many.
Here's to some more pain and suffering in 2008, a little less character development, and many more good times!

In Search of Arnold

I had a fantastic Arnold picture, but i am on my mom's laptop and just couldn't save it to the desktop. No Dice.

But, in search of a meeting with the valiant leader...of our state, i headed to Sacramento for the holidays. My dad says Arnold is probably at Martha's Vineyard or something with the Shrivers, Kennedy's or other clan with some form of importance. So i have settled for a bunch of Duerksen's. two more are due in about 18 minutes which means i will have to share the casseroles and shower time.

Tonight alone i have watched Cars and Ratatouille. I could read something, but come on now.

I have been putting in some floor time honing up on my abs and pushups. i have this issue that i do not have a bike. yah, that's right. 6 more days to go. without a bike. I have been running up and down the halls and may even venture out onto the streets tomorrow to pound some pavement. Rumor has it that a week off is a good thing. i don't believe rumors.

There are two hybrid bikes kickin it in the garage. I may check the air pressure, put on some capris and pedal over to the coffee shop. I just have to find a basket or something.

But i did find this in a magazine, Mountain Flyer, defining the Rocky Mountain Cyclist. That's me...
"Giving yourself an annual break away from the bike has its advantages. You can reduce teh long-term risk of developing cycling-related overuse injuries. It gives you time to sort out any nagging injuries (or mental issues) from the previous season. ..You can maintain your physical condition with even as much as a 50 percent reduction in riding time for a month."

That's just to make all us lazy ones feel better...

I need to get back to my Disney movies.

Unraveling By Moonlight

After spending 5 hours on the road Saturday battling the wind, traffic, and debris in the road in the Inland Empire, we deciede that Sunday we should set out east to embark on another adventure.

Joshua Tree boasted open roads, new pavement, maybe 100 cars in 7 hours, and a prestine blue sky. The only issue with the park is water. Although the temperatures were in the high 50's, one still needs to refill the bottles after a few hours. The decison was made to ride 30 miles to a ranger station to refuel, then head that same 30 back which resulted in a long, steady climb out.

I had a lot of food. I had a lot of water. I had moderate clothing, but i was so hot, both jersey and vest were unzipped all the way, flapping at my sides. my leg warmers and arm warmers were rolled up nicely in my back pocket by my almonds. When i ventured to look up, all the guys had complete jackets on, full legs and long fingered gloves.

I did not feel well. I was beginning to unravel. Pedaling was not an issue at all, the problem rested under my helmet, in my head.


My back hurt, my belly hurt, i was coughing a lot which could have turned into a steady pukefest at any moment. Matt asked if i was doing ok. I calmly repeated the above statement and settled into a silent steady cadence. No use stressing over the facts at hand. Nobody's cell phone worked in the park. Nobody was closer to home than i was.

As we crested the climb, Tom told us that we would be riding out of the park in the dark. But to not worry, because it was the park, not a surface road. As soon as the sun dipped behind the craggly rocks, so did the temperature. My heat laden body quickly began to shiver and i struggled to redress on the shoulder.

We soon realized it was a full moon. THe landscape flipped to an entirely new dimension. Everything was silent except for the occasional vehicle, which slowly passed us. We were on the newly paved section of road, so we knew our lack of lights would only put us in trouble with the night creatures. We settled into a pace line as i stared at the only form of light in the group, a blinkie on Matt's seat post.

A big white truck passed, then slowed, then turned around. Tom's wife Trish has felt the urge to come looking for us and there she was. We threw the bikes in the back, i jumped in the front, pulled my shoes off and jammed my frozen toes as close to the heater vents as possible.

By now it was pitch dark. This segment of the ride was by far my favorite. Its one of those experiences that at the time, i felt so horrible, so incapable of completing the task, yet in the warm car on the way back, while eating a hot burrito, we plotted our next near 7 hour cycle into the wilderness. This was truly a fantastic ride.


Merry Christmas!!

Tan Lines

Yes, it is mid-December. And No, i didn't move to the Southern Hemisphere!

Yes, i am still sporting a "small white t-shirt" and "small white shorts." The last three rides i have taken i have only been covered with shorts, jersey and a base layer, which i almost shed after the first hour of five.

That's just how we do it SoCal. I felt a bit chilly on my spin the other evening, but that is just because the sun had set. My computer said it was 53 degrees. Time for the vest and long fingered gloves! Night spins have been excellent here! A tour of Christmas lights does wonders for the spirits.

Winter Gloom

this time of year i try to be as negative as possible. I need to balance out all the good karma floating around that just makes my skin itch with cheer.

I broke and then promptly lost my camera. If i had it, i would have taken a picture of the Christmas scene right outside my office door. The overwhelming smell of pine is wofting under the "stable" door and i am still angry that they did not fulfill my request for a Live Nativity Scene. If your gonna plug your lights in in my office, at least listen to my wishes.

However, i did find this picture online that closely resembles the winter wonderland that is my world.




There is one week until Christmas break. That week will be packed with banquets, concerts, fundraisers, basketball games, and covert gym runs and cycling in the dark.

That's all i've got. Covert ops and TCB...

Don't let the commercial propaganda suck you in. Buy things for yourself, eat more, and don't decorate the tree.

I'm just saying...

Shoot Them

The maker of the KAZOO, that is.

There was a Kazoo choir in the school concert tonight. They got to skip PE to practice their Kazoos. They then ditched the rest of class, i caught them though. But now they are roaming the halls, playing the kazoo.

It's December, bring on the gifts

I got myself my first Christmas gift today.

My Pro mountain bike upgrade.

I sent the news to some of the people i think are nice.

I should have thought twice.

"You’ve just sentenced yourself to a life of discontent, dissatisfaction, displeasure, misery, sorrow, unhappiness, dejection, and possible depression with a strong contrast of self-conceit (my favorite). Congratulations."

Matthew Freeman

So much for that idea.

What i Really wanted was a nose ring...

But with my job and all, i had to go for a new hair cut

Thanksgiving, on the Flip Side

My sister Julene sent this recap of their New Zealand Thanksgiving.

"we couldn't resist celebrating Thanksgiving with you all...even though we are technically a day early! I cooked up lovely non-traditional Kiwi thanksgiving food and Rouru got costumes! The pictures show "the Indian" (Griffyn) and the powow between the Indians (Rouru and Griffyn) and the cowboys (Narada and Chucky). I was a cowgirl but Griffyn didn't really like that term so I was the photographer."





Im on my way to buy our costumes right now!

Taking them down, one at a time

This has the potential to be very un-PC.

Team PossAbilities, based out of Redlands CA has a wide roster or athletes. My goal, since about August, is to take them down, one at a time. Van got dropped on a Tuesday night group ride. Yup, that counts. Even though he is in med school and was probably up for 36 hours, that's his problem.

Adam took the dive at the Aspen NMBS Final. Although he was delerious from the altitude and couldn't see straight or breath without a paper bag, i beat him. and that counts.

Art is usually about a minute ahead of me, that counts as being taken down.

There is this guy, we call him Church Socks, because he always wears church socks when he rides. His time will come. And soon.

The most recent victim was Eric (well Adam too, but he has already been demoted) at the 12 hours of Temecula. There were some wagers set that i may have slower lap times than them, but i would definately have more laps completed. As i finished my 8th lap, i asked Eric's wife what his story was. He and Adam were out on 8, and probably done. That sealed the deal for me to limp out on my 9th and final lap.

GOING THERE
On the average, i highly dislike race updates. they tend to be run of the mill. "I started strong, someone messed me up, i worked pretty hard, found my fitness and finished so-so. Blah, blah, blah."

BUT, i ventured away from my usual Cross Country events to compete in a 12 hour race on saturday. i dont train for such madness and the longest i have ever been on a bike was 7.5 hrs a few years back when Shelli and i got lost. i have started that base mile stuff that has put me on some 6 hour rides, but that about sums it up.

The event boasted a cornacopia of Who's-who of SoCal, which was great to connect with the crowd i usually wouldn't see until March. The flip side of attendence was quite opposite. They had no clue what the NMBS is, Cal states or that people race at all. These guys are a specail breed that can dig deeper and go longer than most people i have ever ridden with.

Our pit station was killer. A mix of PAssPT, Jose Ole, and PossAbilities, made the stops a little bit more enjoyable.

I tended to ride with packs of single speed guys for about 3 laps until some one had a flat or went into pit. most of my day was spent in utter silence by choice and then by obligation because the effort to speak or formulate conversation was much too taxing.

Vital stats:
I had fun
I never wanted to quit
I did not sit down from 9am-8:20pm
Ride time was 10hr 45min (probably about 11:20 with pits)
9 laps
95 miles
Something like 14,500ft of climbing
I never puked, just wanted to

The people, like Pua, who actually DO these events, and maintain the same lap times, over and over, amaze me. The depth of their ability ot suffer is astounding.

I rode my bike yesterday. We are still friends.

Maybe this weekend i will try a cross race. Why not.

It's Been a Week, i have made some very bad choices

1. I agreed to ride my mountain bike for 12 hours straight on saturday. yeah, thats right. and it was probably a bad choice.

2. i started commuting to work via bike. it takes 15-25 minutes depending on the train schedule and the sun setting schedule.

3. I stopped commuting to work via bike and this is why:
A. It made me sweat before work, it is not a long enough voyage to kit-up for, so i sweated in my work clothes. thats sick. i dont want to waste another change of clothes for 30 minutes of ride time, i would rather waste .056 gallons of gas. Being sweaty at the start of the day makes my capris or shorts fit weird (i dont own pants). It also makes my hair uncooperative and my face prone to acne.

B. Where i live, i am surrounded by students. They honk at me, ask me if i need gas money so i can drive to work or their parents roll down the window and ask if i need a ride. this is embarrasing. I also saw some "cyclists" out for a ride while i was going home with my backpack, sneakers and khaki shorts. they gave me the look. not the good one. But maybe they saw my tan lines...

C. Friday i rode my bike to a volleyball pool party. All the kids and their parents passed me on the way there. This was awkward.

D. I take a lot of things with me. loading up the BOB trailer just wasnt a good idea.

This whole issue will be revisted tomorrow morning as i contemplate my wardrobe for the day and whether or not the sweat marks will enhance it, or bump it down a notch.

Parent Teacher Conferences

Why is it, that they just don't care if their child has a C in PE, which by the way, takes more effort to receive than an A? So may schedule is long and open. Giving me ample time to tie up some loose ends, check out some "stuff" and do some "things."

FRENEMIES: an account of the mustache ride
In the land of bikes, the emotions can run thick

At times you love your friends, and at others they just make you sick

It is a delicate matter, when to shun them or when they are the first ones you would pick

On this night, there wasn’t even a trick

They made the options quite obvious, like being hit with a brick

That until they shaved, the name enemies would have to stick

Growth

My hair grew.

Now i look like Boo.

Half Breed

I got a new bike.

Its pretty hot.

A bit like a Mullet, but backwards. Big in the front, small in the back. i have no idea what it will ride like or feel like, but i am sure it will be worth the effort.

I am planning on breaking it at the 12 hours of Temecula, "racing" solo. Should be a pleasent day in the saddle!

The little red Specialized is going back tomorrow, i tried to clean it as best i could, and gave it one last hurrah on Sunday. That sure was a nice toy!!

Breaking News: Fontana National Short Track Race Course

Due to an overwhelming amount of smack talk from around the country regarding the Fontana race venue, somethings will be changing. Now this is in no way an attempt to appease the high-faluten, altitude stricken, ski resort riding racers who have yet to understand the fact that urban riding is alive and well in America. Quite the contrary.

The STXC race will be held in the remotely close town of Redlands. WHAT! You can drive across the country, you can drive across the county. ACtually, it will probably be a shorter drive than that from your hotel in Ontario to the venue.

REQUIREMENTS: Single Speed or fix gear road bike. Actually a "go to market bike" works really well on this course too. No nobby tires aloud. this will be a night venue, so head lamps, handle bar lights and blinkies are a MUST!!! Street clothes is preferred, but if you must, a shammie can be worn UNDER your other clothes. YOu will not be aloud to race with a jersey on. No exceptions!!



THE COURSE: The start will be in the middle of the CRIT course for the Redlands Bicycle Classic. Why NOT! IT will be fast with many turns and then the fun begins! You will drop into the ONLY under ground parking garage IN TOWN and complete DOZENS of laps INSIDE! Every 12th lap you will pop out onto the crit course, hit that one up a bit and then drop back in for 12 more.

I am very excited to be hosting this event with my team, and the RedAsphalt ride... WAY more to come later!!!

Somebody else's great idea...

DOESN'T ALWAYS WORK FOR EVERYONE

The exterior of my office went from Fall Fodder to your local recycling center.


At least Dozer, the school mascot is always close by


This was not my idea either: But i did make that sign. Actually, i just painted it. Some got on my shoe, so i felt invested.



This one was genious: A trash can, brilliant.


Joshua Tree
in an attempt to run away from the smoke hovering over the homeland, Christtie, Trevor, Matt and I headed to J Tree last weekend for some base miles. I saw a lot of this for 4 hours.


Yah, that's right.

Intra-Office fun

Matt and Christie work across the street from me. I could throw softballs at their cars as they drive by, and possibly tag them with a frisbee as they are walking to the cafe. They both stare at computers all day. So does Trevor. But he doesn't work across the street. But i am sure i could derail him from his Fixed Gear as he rides to work. Just keep pedalling...(Think Dori from NEMO here)

SO i devised an exciting game. MADLIBS are back and more fun than ever. I send them the parts of speech needed, then fill it in, print them, take them home to the Johnson family who reads them, laughs, cries, and votes on the winner of the day. we are doing a best out of 5, and the prize is yet to be selected.

THIS WEEKS WINNER IS:

MADLIB #1
BEAUTY ADVICE
NAME: MATT

If your skin is STUNNING or ANNOYING, you can cure this condition with the following regimen. Every morning, before washing your ILIAC CREST, massage it gently with a/an MICROWAVE that has been soaked overnight in a/an ERN full of warm PEDIALITE. Then mix together some ICE CREAM and some PLACE MAT until the mixture becomes BREATH TAKING, and pat this onto your RIPPED face for five minutes. Then remove, using a/an POWER POINT, and wash your face with SUCCULANT water. Do not omit this VULUPTIOUS step, or your skin will become TWIGGY. Do this LOVINGLY every day, and you will soon be as BONEY as ANNETTE.

Things, Muy Grande

I HAVE A HUGE CALCULATOR, WHAT DO YOU HAVE? Luna's got nothing on us!

I HAVE TWO DOORS TO MY OFFICE...one has dry wall on the inside. sometimes i hear people knocking on my "wall."


THE OTHER ONE opens into a world i am not sure i want to be part of. i really dont like the holidays and i really do not like lame decorations. The Home and School committee feels otherwise. My office is in a keen spot for entry to events, thus, i live in a barn. Please note the door to the stable. The floor is covered with hay droppings.


TODAY, FAIRY TALE DAY: The cow jumped over the moon, and landed on my field. i did get permission to use this outfit for a Cross Race. If i ever actually commit to doing one.


CINDERELLA: Most of the time they look like this -


BUT I THINK WE PULLED IT OFF PRETTY WELL. Totally NOT my idea. I DO NOT play well with others. But, i had two coworkers say they thought of it and we just rolled wtih it. I had a prince, fairy god mother and the works. Dont worry, it didnt last for long.


I GOT DUNKED: Thank goodness they set up a parasol. it was hot, 68 degrees outside. They even made the water hot. I knocked myself in twice, and when i sat too far forward the chair would hit me on the spine. I have a bruise now.