8 weeks to a thinner you...

And other scams. This headline is what met me as i opened up Yahoo News this morning, i mean afternoon when i finally arose from doing some serious sleep-debt payback. But why do i still feel like i got run over by a small farm machine?

So as soon as i am done here i will start planning my next 8 weeks to being gaunt, i mean skinny. Maybe they will suggest parking in the farthest spot from the grocery store and foregoing all condiments, even cream in the coffee. sure, that is really going to shed the pounds.

I did my cycling at the gym yesterday because a) it was reallly hot outside b) free hot water, no worries about the propane % c) my ability to self-motivate is at an all-time low. I cant go in there and ride the bike for 15 minutes and pretend i am all bad, you actually have to stay awhile. I did, however, run into some problems. I go to the farthest corner of the aerobics room, by the step boxes and boxing bags and usually turn the lights off. But they still come. People see me in there, are you teaching a class?? What? In the corner with my iPod and alone? NO! But they proceed to PULL not properly move the bikes across the floor. Once again i have to digress from my workout to instruct them on proper bike movement, even though they should not be there. Then they ride it like a BMX bike, knees hitting their chest, one speed all out. They see me climb out of the saddle and they follow, leaning on the handle bars, feet spinning out of control like the Road Runner. At least it took some of the pain away while i wondered how i would tell them that they needed bilateral knee replacements.

BETTER COMPARISON:















A BIT OF A TOUR:
This is the Spare Room. i havent had one of these, ever in my life. if there was a room, someone was living in it or was at college put lived in it on weekends or holidays. please notice the yellow bike, thats the new one! Yes, the Sonoma number plate is still on it, but i HAVE NOT ridden it since!! And yes, i do know that the other bike has no seat. There is even a mattress under this bed, it is supposed to be a bunk bed but there is NO way it would ever fit! So slumber parties are definately being planned for the near future!!






LIVING ROOM: Please know that my old house was NO LARGER THAN THIS ROOM!! I realized today that Dozer sleeps on the futon, which is why there is a cover on the cover. I also have no idea what to do with the blue ethernet cord, there is only one phone jack that works. Maybe a huge rug. I am also afraid of the wood stove, but i am sure that will pass.

No more tour pictures today. Tomorrow we may head outside to the "Summer Kitchen" and i will highlight some of the other high end features!

Bikes All Around: I mentioned before that i went to my buddy Haidi's bday party. well she got hooked up with a killer bike! Basket and all. The seat was falling into the frame so i went to the car and got my tools and fixed it. THis actually made me look like a freak, so did the 37 on my calf from the race earlier that day. If they only knew...

One at A Time

One little photo at a time, you can see a bit of what im talking about. This is Ruger, Dozers brother. Bets are being placed on who would win in a tussle.

Ok, so Snoopy Dozzy Doz takes a lot of naps. I really want to super-impose the pictures of the pets on each other to see how they really match up!

Once again, Griffyn with not much clothes on. This kid is crazy and i am quite excited that he and his mom are coming over from New Zealand for my little wedding!

So i have no pictures of races or events or neat things like that. Maybe by the end of the season i will catch some good ones so that i can share! Tomorrows pictures will cover the HOUSE that i now hang out in and that has internet! Thank goodness!

I am quite void of funny stories too, a bit of a let down i must say.

SORRY!!!

Sorry for sure, it has taken me a year and a half to update this thing! So much has happened, not happened, or will happen that i do not even know where to begin!!

WHY DID I NOT UPDATE?: Thank you for asking! I no longer have internet at home. It MAY resume on the 24th, but who really knows. At the same time, my computer was taken at work for upgrading, forcing me to poach a front office computer between the hours of 9 and 9:15 (summer hours of course) or go to Kinkos and use my nonexistant credit card to get online simply to check out peoples info.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?: Well, once again, thank you for probing. First i went to Deer Valley Utah then i went to my house. Then i went to Sonoma CA then Pismo then my house.

DV: Did a little bike race here. This was fun and family man freeman carted us all around in a suburban and we all stayed in style and comfort and raced so nice little trails. Didnt place so good, but thats ok. I had things to work on like dont freak out and ideas like think about racing, not dozer or snacks I also really worked on my descending and rode all the nasty little tricky spots.

SONOMA: I went solo on this one in the fantastic non-AC jeep (they told me $800 to fix it, so i drove the back way) the jeep also decided to over heat numerous times and leave gallons of coolant all over I5. Interesting things: Saw a truck tire BLOW off on I5. Saw a semi use the "runaway truck ramp" on the 101. Decided i would never ever live off the 5 bewteen here and pretty much mt shasta. awful places for sure. If you ever have to move to Shafter or Coalinga, i am sorry. I also saw Onions, tomatoes, hay, alfalfa and garlic ALL OVER the road and when i drove behind those wonderful trucks, all above mentioned treats ended up in the car due to all the windows being open.

I got to the venue at 4:54pm. Registration closed at 5pm, forever, i was stressed, only a little though. haha. After being told by Trek Josh that i was too amped up to preride with him (shocking after 10 hours alone and 4 dr. peppers) i checked out the course and realized that all my contacts for a place to stay had never called me back and i had never thought about it. oops. so at 8:20pm i am cruising Napa trying to remember where my non-Aunt lives. It all worked out, but i kinda added some stress.

XC: This was fun and quite interesting, but ended up being very disturbing. I felt really good the whole. Actually strong and condifent. I came in last in my category. SO it that a bad thing???? I still beat the usuals in other cats like the 19-24s etc, but none of the ones i was actually racing. STXC was a bit of a redemption in that i was 22/35 or something. i was called up 2nd to last in the largest ever open women field so i just had to start picking them off. I rode this one really smart i think and picked really good lines and used my gears well, whatever makes you feel good about coming in 22nd i guess. But i actually laughed OUT LOUD because there was a HUGE pile up where the pavement went to dirt and it funnelled us in there onto the mountain cross bumps. i had bet myself (due to being alone ALL WEEKEND) that people would eat it here, so when they did i just got off, pointed and laughed and ran by.

Oh yes, i did all this with a new carbo hard tail.

ROUNDS: I was able to make quite the social rounds while up there. I grew up in the Napa Valley and spent college and post college there, so i had a lot of catching up to do. I saw theBlunts who have Dozers brother - pictures to come of course!! Then i hung out with Haidi - one of my basketball teammates who was celebrating her 27th bday! Here i ran into tons of riff-raff, you know the type you had intro to physics with and maybe borrowed their calculator once, but now we are supposed to reflect on some fantastic history together, and then actual old bball teammates and pals. Sunday i drove to Stanford to see the Clark family for delicious food! Jesse is the old bball coach, wife Kelly is the strength coach at Stanford and little Jake well he just plays with stuff. Then i headed to Pismo where Grandma D is in a rehab place for a broken femur! Yikes!!! She and grandpa just moved from Yosemite to San Luis Obispo so he and i had breakfast monday. he made pancakes, 1/3 a canteloup (EACH) a nectarine, oj, and banana bread. It was really funny and good! I also stayed with the Hamricks In Shell Beach. It was like the family tour. I just wished my bikes could have been people so a) i could talk to them and b) i could use the carpool lane!!

MUSIC: i realized that i mostly listened to musica en espanol or r&b while i drove. I never could really tell what was on the station since i was giong at least 78 mph and all the windows were open. I would be singing along, just a bit then slow down and realize i couldnt understand a word they were saying.

NEW PLACE TO RIDE: I did a little Poop out and Jenks lake last week, fantastic!!

PLUMES OF SMOKE: I am not really afraid, yet, i think. But then when i come down the mountain and pass 4 complete CDF strike teams, you get a bit nervous. LAst week it looked like an A bomb had gone off at the end of the Canyon and the sun sets a dirty red color, other than that, no ash and no trees for tinder, yet...

SQUARE NO MORE: i really did live in a square. About 20x20. If you dont believe, well you should. But over the Deer Valley weekend and even through today, i upgraded. Quality of life has increased exponentially except for the refridgerator that is sitting on the patio until i take the kitchen door off to get it in. I will have to a thank you blog in the near future for all those who made this move a possibility and who have helped furnish it!!!! My home phone number is still the same, so you cant use that for an excuse of not calling me.

CHANGE OF TONE: This issue has been at the forefront of my mind for about 4 weeks. I have seen 5 severe and horrific car crashes between the bridge in Forest Falls and the Jerky Hut in the last 4 weeks. From what i know, 4 of those resulted in fatalities, one my have been a double. the most recent was last night, right around dusk, about 2 minutes from my house. One of Jasons dish washers from Forest Home flipped his car and got it stuck between two trees where he passed away. he could not have been more than 17 years old. This marks the anniversary of another dishwasher and his dad who passed away due to an illegal pass on hwy 38. All the others have taken place on the flats. The speed limit is 50 i think but most people drive it 65. People dont realize we hug the line of the wilderness and that creatures come out. They also dont realize that the thin line is also one where people live. The one i saw when driving back from Ontario airport and Deer Valley was a 13 year old and 18 year who were both riding the same bike with no helmets or lights on a shoulder that does not exist at 11pm, where they were hit by a guy who didnt even have a license and who fled the scene. It makes me irate as a cyclists and as a teacher, from both angles. The next day about 300 yards up a volkswagen golf was wrapped around a tree in someones front yard. Seeing all this carnage has made me think twice about car selections, who i get in the car with and where/when i ride my bike. So many people are coming up to the falls or the creek, pounding the brews, then rocketing home. Every week i see a new cross errected on the side of the road with teddy bears and flowers and pictures. it seems that every week they creap closer to home. Pretty much, please be careful. We cant over analyze and freak out and stay in the house, but please, double and triple check your situations and decisions.

Who's Cool Now??

I am!! First of all, i am done with that basketball camp, so i dont really have to go "down the mountain." I had to go teach spin class, very lack-lusterly though. Then come back up and promptly took a nap with Dozer. Gotta love him! I thought he broke my nose though. He sneazed and with all his square headed might, caught me upside the nose. I may have just received a deviated septum, too early to know. Just kidding, but wouldnt that be lame to have a broken nose because your dog sneezed on you? Dumb. I would probably miss the rest of the season! I hear those things really hurt. Any jarring just sends the pain train.

I am pretty sure that i am going to Deer Valley Utah this thursday for a little biking competition. I am planning on not falling as much and i really need to be on my best behavior because we are staying with a gaggle of cyclists that are well, pretty cool i guess. I will limit my vrebage to 8 words per conversation so as not to overwhelm. I will also make sure i speak slowly and at a lower decibal so they can actually understand what i am talking about. Then i will have to monitor my caffeine/sugar intake. Good thing mr. Pleiss is not going, he is a very bad influence! Hopefully Christie can get me my boarding pass ahead of time again, that way all i ahve to do is show up. but maybe i will actually pay attention as to where we park/stay/go so i dont have to spend hours trying to figure out how to get home. Or someone else can just drive. I never thought i could become co-dependant!

I havent really seen anyone in a long time. All my super cool work friends are well, on vacation. My PT/Dental friends are on brake or in clinics. I have been riding a training solo, so i am getting really annoyed with myself and my iPod selections, but i disconnected my account with iTunes which was the only way i would stop down loading 80's songs at $0.99 a pop.

Oh yes, this is why i am cool. Yesterday was the "9th Annual Forest Falls Chili Cook Off." My man Jason had this really great idea of helping out. Then he went to work. So there i sat, at the ARM WRESTELING BOOTH, trying to get people to throw down. First everyone thought they would have to arm wrestle me. Funny how the cycling tan stops right at the top of my bicep which gives the illusion that it is huge (not that it isnt though..). Then i put a sign on the Pets neck and walked around. The brilliant things i heard were "look, its an arm wresteling dog." um, no. So then you have the hard core guys who hit up all the county fairs asking what the weight classes were. I said it was about 80 pounds, so everyone was in. They also said the table just woudlnt do, not strong enough. Where are the elbow pads? What are the rules? Far out man, just give me a ticket!!! So i made the winner a 12 year old kid and walked him over to get his trophy.

This is, however, the coolest day in FF. Maybe next year i will bring some of you flat landers up, but i myself have just worked into being cool here, so i dont want you to hold me back. I was even in the Town Photo, infront of the El Mex store. Im on the right side, white tank if you buy it on eBay. There were chili contests, pie and salsa contests, pet parade and kid show and live music. The fire truck pulled a wagon with hay bales and another one came through and watered everyone down. Not bad for a day in the woods.

Shout Out

Totally want to take this moment to give a shout out to my hommies at Redlands Complete Auto. These guys were great. They not only destroyed the jeeps head gaskets but to also dismantle my Air Conditioning Thank you. I have now experienced 108 degrees in southern californias finest gridlock while sitting on black leather. This was a fantastic time. Just let me say that i truly have no love for hoyty-toyty upper class nice-car-driving people with AC that look at me driving with my windows down, in disgust. I hate them. It is also not cool to walk into an important meeting drenched, literally, in sweat. The head guy asked me, seriously, if i had ridden my bike there. I said no and plastered myself against the coolest thing i could find: THe cinder block wall in the well cooled office.

I have been hammering out some fantastic miles these days and trying to beat the heat. Checking out some new Cole Wheels not bad at all. I still miss the whir of my Chris King hubs though. The Santa Anna River Trail is pristine (just keep going through the cut up section) and i was moderatly sad that i did run across any creatures. I had no HRM, no computer, and no iPod. I was truly flying solo and it was awesome!

The Girls
I went to a boarding school in Shenandoah Valley Virginia for High school. By a strike of fait, many of us still hang out, work together or live near each other all the way out here in So Cal!! All of these girls went to my High School and only one was in another class than us! Here is the run-down: back row L-R: Betsy from TENN - Dental Hygenist; Kate TENN Med school; Me duh, woods, PE slacker; Jessica Maryland - Interior Designer; Carrianne MENTONE MOM and massage therapist
Front row: Tiffany Hawaii - Technology teacher and DESIGNER she makes clothes!!!; Rachel Redlands - Graffic Designer

See i even hang out with people that arent bike freaks! Most of them have bikes but have expressed numerous times that they are afraid to ride with me! Like i would hurt them or something. I could only stay at the BBQ for a bit because, well my life is CHAOS!!!

Please dont stalk my friends. I know they are cute, but leave them alone!!

I missed Rim Nordic this past weekend. I just cant do them all. I started out with the plan to go to all the Nationals, we will see though, sometimes things just dont work out!

BASKETBALL

i AM now working at a basketball camp for 4-9th graders. These kids are wild! It makes for a super long day running 8-4pm. The gym has no AC like i need it though. I have to be really carefull not to eat too much lunch or i get this killer Food Coma I really have to start remembering what these kids say. Some of it wouldnt make sense to the general public because it is pretty basketball specific. But none the less, it is pretty funny. This one kid is totally the NarWhal From Elf talks like him and everything! The three guys i am coaching with all coach up north. Two coach at the college that i played basketball at and one used to coach at the high shcool that shared our gym. Pretty funny stuff. One of them even owns Dozers brother Ruger.

Dozer is doing very well, thank you for asking! We have been going on hikes to the post office on the single track, then heading across the road to the creek where we go in the swimming hole and walk up the creek bed all the way home. I got really sunburned doing that.

So if you want to go where it is 20 degress cooler, clean are and delicious artesian well water, let me know and you can go visit someone in Big Bear. I mean we can meet for some fun. Or picking up sticks.

Every Day...

I blog away.

Wedding Registry 101
Totally hit up Bed, Bath and Beyond today. They gave me the whole deal about going to a Bridal Show and planning blah blah blah. Uriah was sitting on the floor or twirling in the chair so i told the guy to get to it.

When you create a registry, and i am far from done by the way, and other stores will be added and probably taken off in the near future, you have to put a little of everything. The under $10 items for those who dont want to pay up, and the over $200 items for those who feel bad about something. There are a few items, however, that are paramount. If i get these (please note the word "I") i will give the giver something grand: THE MAGIC BULLET as seen on TV no i do not have a TV, but when i did, i saw this infomercial a lot and MUST HAVE IT!! Only $49.99!
This one is special! The Single Egg Fry Pan i did buy one awhile back, but it just didnt last. Please note that the egg is frowning.

Probably if you buy me these, i will make you something delicious with them. The Bullet - well you pick. Bean Dip; mixed drink; chocolate mousse; smoothie. The Egg Killer - an egg. Pretty much meets the amount of cash you put towards it.

I will be sure to highlight my favorite items from each registry to insure that i get them. Speaking of INSURE http://ensure.com/ is supposed to be a really good during the race/ride beverage. Also, i have read TWICE that Chocolate OValtine is just as good as our high end recovery drinks, and a lot cheaper. And yes, i do read. Jason thinks i am illiterate, i just cant spell.

I lost some stuff

Man, I lose EVERYTHING! First, i couldnt find the USB thing to put some pictures on this thing, now i cant find the camera to attach to the USB thing that i just found! Oh well. I really didnt take any cool pictures. i think about cool things to take pictures of, but it is just too time consuming. I know, point and shoot, but come on, i am pretty busy.

Today Uriah and I did a million things. We walked on "single track" to the mountain post office to pick up very exciting junk mail. We then took pet Dozer to the creek because he was overheating. We decided to walk up the creek bed for some excellent leg work. We then went to the "city" where it was over 100 degrees for some delightful whole wheat subs and laundry, lots of it. Home Girl Robyn come and hung out with us at the Mentone washette, what a friend. Sure made the time fly!

VT
I forgot about some things in VT. I got a new roommate. Teri and i pretty much did everything together. Stay in a small room in twin beds, talk about food, boys and our pets. This girl is CRAZY about cats (not KITTENS) and i am crazy about Dozer (duh) so most of our conversations vierd in that direction eventially. This was fun, very fun.

The girls laughed "with" me a lot, but when i think about it, they may have been laughing "at" me. hmmm, suspect. I also realized that Greg and i have a lot in common. Sugar, snacks, bagels, food, sitting around! He was excellent to have on the trip and oh so helpful. I felt so bad that he worked on my bike a bit that i gave him my LAST Nerd Rope aka nerds stuck together with gooey goodness for all his efforts. That IS a big deal!

Funny thing on the course: i will select ONE
I slid off of wood bridge, first oh 6 minutes of the race, rear tire first. Fell on my back between the bridge and a tree, bike on top of me. Begin to get up. Girl does the exact same thing and falls on top of me with her bike. hmm. Then the racers coming on the course start yelling to get out of the way. Suspect, very suspect.

GOOD
i LOVED the course marshals! They all talked a bit funny like Canada and Louisinna, must be North East. They were really very nice! Maybe it was because i had been hanging around the course for 3 days doing multiple pre-rides (walks) so they knew me by jersey.

STUPID
I asked if it Snowed in Albany. idiot.
A girl said she liked my jersey (who knows why) and asked where i was from. Said SO Cal, she asked if i ride in Sonoma a lot. No.

I need to go bleach my teeth.

I really don't want to update my blog

I am feeling bland and overwhelmed leaving me with only a slight sense of humor and a slice of angst.

There are many directions i could go for this past weekend: bitter, afraid, excited, hilarious

I could delve into all the nasty things i heard and the attitudes that were copped. I could divulge my new excitement for maybe one day being a team manager and always hanging around in the pro feed zone. (They better have a budget for me though, i dont do all charity work) I could talk about the insane racers on the east side and my new wish to move to Vermont so that i can train there, serious.

But the bottom line is this: I got bit by really large bugs in annoying spots that still really hurt.

Actually, i loved my recent adventure. I have never been mentally tested like this in a race before. I have been pushed physically but not quite like this. I saw the event as a training day to build my descending confidence and skill, which definately happened. I heard people cheer for me and even say my name that i have never met! The top of the expert field still even talked to me and wanted to know how i did and affirmed my efforts. Everyone has developed from somewhere. Everyone has had to be pulled from an event, for some it was last week, for others it was 5 years ago, but the event took place none the less.

I found that just as motivating and exciting as racing is watching the race. I met a tone of people in the feed zone, one being Adam Craigs feeder. i also got to get autographs from all the Luna Chics and chatted a bit with Georgia Gould.

I got back into LAX at 5pm so i just decided to put my bike together in the long-term parking lot instead of getting on the freeway parking lot. Then of course i got lost on the way home, because i dont "do" freeways or LA, then my cell phone battery died so i couldnt call anyone and when i used a pay phone in Fontanait took my 55 cents and said try again.

Next up: some serious bike cleaning, serious training, and non-serious grad school!

Then off to Deer Valley in a few! At least i didnt womit this time!
Oh yes, my rear wheel minus tire, tube, cassette, and maybe spokes, will be racing in the World Cup in Mont Saint Anne this weekend. Go wheel go! Actually go Teri and Christie!!!

Going on an Outing

Today is spent tallying student absences and tardies and averages and totals in an attempt to get out of work early. Once i hit the home turf i must figure out how to dismantle my bike appropriately and place it nicely in its little traveling box.

Christie, Mr. Pleiss and i are on a red eye from LAX to Albany to embarc on my first ever non CA/UT race! I am excited being words, yet terrified! We are heading to Vermont for the NMBS #3.

I hear they have killer single track and delicious Maple Syrup, so if nothing else swings in my favor, i know a great time will be had and excellent food will be eaten. And thats what it is all about!!

I havent had any pics of the nephew for a bit, i think he wears clothes, maybe only when they go to church though! What a nudist!

OCD

This blog entry is dedicated to all the things non-cycling in my life. I would like to prove that i am not completely consumed by the bike and that i indeed lead a well-rounded and multi-faceted life, where biking is merely my means to deal with all things good and bad and to keep me in shape and motivated and to maintain a high quality of life. Ok, so it is pretty important.

There are days that i do not ride my bike, clean it, fix it, or even move it. On these days i enjoy doing the dishes, cleaning my house, petting Dozer and picking up sticks in the yard. I have been known to iron t-shirts and color code all polo shirts in my closet (i have to wear them to work.)These days you may also find me in graduate school learning not all that much about teaching. In the winter these specific days will send me to the High Desert or Desert Desert for various sports contests with a myriad of jr. high or high school students. Usual i drive them and coach them and make them play "name that tune" with the 80's rock station because that is the only way that i consistantly win!

Although most people think i am obsessed with the bike, i am more obsessed with making things clean and tidy and organized, thus the frequent tag of OCD. I really like to cook too - while working at a Bike shop up north, i also worked at a Bed and Breakfast where i learned to make some delightful things! Stuff like Potato Crust Frittata, baked/glazed grapefruit, and french toast souffle. If i had a house larger than 3 parking spots, i would entertain every weekend! I never cook out of a box for sure, and when cooking I turn my head and ignore all signs of carbohydrates, saturated fats, and sugar. Duh.

I am also in the midst of planning a delightful wedding. I have pretty much been putting this off, but now my co-workers have just showed me binders full of floral arrangments, ring designs, table layouts, and up-dos. I am way behind track, but that is ok.


I have parents too. They live smack dab in the middle of Florida, strategily placed so that if you sat on the roof around 9pm, you could see the fireworks from Sea World, Epcot, Disney, and MGM all at the same time! They travel around the world taking pictures and doing neat things! They keep trying to make us kids move to FL, but that is a total no-go!

Uriah and Jason are totally real too. I have a picture, but i can't seem to post it! Uriah is 7 and just finished the first grade. I am totally going to brain wash him and make him race bikes. I think he will give it a go at the next Cal State. He just has a BMX and is arfaid the pegs could hurt another kid, so he wants to take them off. When discussing upgrading with him, he stated that he would not move up to expert until he was consistantly winning the races and beating everyone. good to know!

Jason is a finish-carpenter and has made some quite impressive things like huge decks, ornate window casings, doors that started as trees, and an observatory.

Contrary to popular belief, i do read, magazines. I will let all my Title9, Athleta, and REI catalogs pile up. Then i will go through each one, circle everything i want with a Sharpie, then promplty throw them away.
So things are pretty interesting for me. But now, my bike is sitting on the steps, ready for a washing!

Dude, my shins are sweating!!!

It's been a bit on the warm side these days. My very high quality g-ride no longer has AC, so i created a new one: 2n70 no this is not a new back woods fire ride such as 1E01. This means 2 windows down, drivin 70. However, while traveling to Riverside for grad school, i max out around 15 mph, so basically i sweat a lot. Now driving has become my zen emotional training. Focus, breath deep, relax. This really hasnt helped at all though.

HYDRATE OR DIE: HYDRATE AND DIE!!

Do you remember, i think it was the Power Ade slogan "Hydrate or die?" Well this can be quite deceiving. One day i will write a race report that goes like this: "The race was wonderful. Lovely weather and the competition was really slow, but very nice and sociable. We also had delicious food and felt very relaxed on the ride home. We are all winners...."

However: SANTA BARBARA BIKE FESTIVAL CAL STATE #5

Race time: 2:10pm
Race Temp: 100 degrees, perhaps
Race Length: 4 x 6 miles (this is stupid - my computer got all messed up. I thought we had just raced 32 miles. When i was looking down and it said "24" i was freaking out, because i hit the wall at about 25. I was also in awe of myself because i was climbing steady at 7mph. Actually, that was Kilometers PH STUPID!!!!
The Course: Fantastic if you are a really fast one on the descnets, and if you enjoy crop signs or the movie SIGNS. i felt as if we were creating miniature lines in a corn field, this time it was Annis actually, as we swooped down the single track, around the burms and through the brush. Nothing was taller than a corn stalk, and most of it was not wider than your average single track. Everything was hard packed and at times it looked like you were riding on grape seeds (growing up in the Napa valley exposed me to interesting trail conditions.) You could always see who was 3 turns ahead of you as they pasted through the thicket. Once i thought this girl was right behind me but what i htought was her helmet was a big flower pod, when looked at out of the corner of my eye, appeared much larger than it was...

It was late in the day and hot. I am a compulsive water drinker. Ever since Shelli and i got lost in the San Bernardino mountains, i fear the feeling of dehydration. I do everything in my power to avoid being in that spot. Sometimes i drink a whole bottle of water without even noticing it. So prior to the race, i had A LOT of fluid. Bad, bad, bad. During the race, i was ok. Then i began to get a splitting head ache, like really bad. On the last dirt hill climb out, my right quad started to cramp up super bad. I have never cramped before, i know, rookie. But i just sat back and told myself "so this is what a cramp feels like. Will it pull the muscle off or just twist it around a bit?" I ended up in 2nd place, which was just fine with me. My tan through jersey really did a number to the back. It is like i wasnt even wearing one, too much sun! I had traveled there with Christie and Teri scored her first pro podium with a stellar 3rd place finish, so of course we hung around!

Christie was having bad legs cramps and dizzy and feeling yuck, so i started the drive back. By the time we got to Ventura Chevron i promptly went over to the bushes and womitted, a lot. Poor Christie. You know you really have a friend when they tell you it is ok to puke in there car! I wonder what Mr. Pleiss would think about that one...

This continued for some time. I nicely asked Christie to pull over to the side of the freeway twice to help me with my situation. One of the time James Cross stopped to help out! What a champ! He was feeding us all during the race and was super supporter for the day! I couldn't even rest my head on the seat because the steady bumps in the road, i had to prop my elbow on the window and hold my head in my hand. Poor Christie was becoming quite bored with me while she was trying to stay away. She was so PC it was hilarious. Jeremy from K&N called for the race update and she said "JOY became sick." iF they only knew!!

Now i had to drive from Reldands to Forest Falls at 10:15pm. I really wanted Pedialyte from Staters, so i stopped and zig-zagged in. Once inside, i promptly had to puke. I ran outside and that was that. I found myself slumped on the curb by the planters, wanting to curl up right there for a nap. AS i sat there i wondered what people thought of me: severly sunburned, blurry-eyed, vomiting in a bush, late on a Saturday night. If they only knew...

I got home safely although i had to squint the whole time because my head hurt so bad. I laid down, motionless for about 45 minutes. then sat up, ate some food and pedialyte and was pretty much ok.

So, what happened you ask: HYPOTREMIA hydration intoxication. I had way too much of the good stuff. What this does is totally deplete your body of sodium, which is bad, very bad. It acts just like dehydration with nausea, headache, muscle cramps, dizziness. I read, online, that is can also cause "disorientation, slurred speech, confusion, inappropriate behavior, brain swelling, coma, and death." YIKES!!! I am so glad that all i did was puke my brains out! I think i lost 2 pounds. I also think that i consume so much water, i could stop drinking today, exercise for two days, and not get dehydrated. I need fix that one.

How do you fix the problem? Add extra sodium to your diet 2-3 days prior to events (and become hypertensive) and dont drink more than you sweat. Also, you could createt he same effects by drinking too much water the days prior. If you went to the hospital they would give you super consitrated sodium solution and a diuretic to make you dispell all the extra water.

Good to know!! Since we are getting into the hot super hot nasty oweful season, these things really need to be attained to. Although as i look back, the whole thing was entertaining, but not pleasant at all. Very dangerous too. There is such a fine line on these issues, you have to be careful.

QUESTION OF THE DAY: i KNOW i already asked some of you and you think i am stupid, BUT...you are not supposed to water your lawn mid day because it will get burned and die. The water particles magnify the suns intensity and burn it. So was it bad that these guys were spraying us with hoses and water bottles as we rode by? Could that shock our systems and make me act like a giant blade of grass roaming through the trails, causing me to get over burned and taxed? You have to answer this one, because i really need to know. Scientific proof is highly suggested.

blogity blog

TOO MUCH INFORMATION:

So a lot has gone down in the near past. The sophomore boilogy trip was awesome! We set up camp in drippy weather and slept through one night of rain. Day one found us on a Whale Watching boat in the Monterey Harbor. We were all stoked to see Humpback Whales, Otters, harbor Seals, Risso Dolphins, and a lot of birds! We kept encouraging the sea-sick kids to take it for the team and throw out some chum so we could have more visitors, but that didn't happen!

Day two we traveled up to San Fransisco to visit the Exploratorium. I have never been around so many chaotic children! I think the place was packed with 5th graders! We did see some really cool exhibits and expiraments. Next, we drove about 4 minutes to the Golden Gate Bridge. Although i grew up in the area, i had never walked the bridge before, so i was happy we got to do it. Plus, it helped with the Bus-Legs i was suffering from. This was also the day that i wanted to jump out of the bus at hour 39 of constantly being with people, but i didnt and i survived. i began to actually enjoy people!

It was also interesting to explain these very pointed call boxes to the children. I think when i was in college there was an individual who jumped from the bridge and lived, they hit a barge or something.

Day 3 was my almost-favorite day. We went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium. Being with a school and all, we got to go into a special lab area and touch things! IT was set up as a class, but super interesting, kinda like PE. We got to feed Sea Cucumbers, squid, irchins, abalone, and anenomies. It was great! I also say this guy, kinda reminded me of the Otter walking around Laguna Seca...

I am not a huge walk-around and look at stuff person, but this place was great! I would totally go back and look at neat things. We watched Trout swim upstream for about 10 minutes, and watched Penguins dance about. The kids in my group had to keep coming back to find me because i was staring at stuff too long!

The afternoon on this day we went back to our camp sites in Felton (near Santa Cruz) to create our own expiraments out in the Redwoods. The group i was "chaperoning" chose to provide the entertainment. Their expirament consisted of 3/4 of them going arm-pit deep into the ice cold stream to calculate and measure the speed of the current and the depth of the water. To say the least, we got more than our moneys worth!

Day 4 My absolute favorite! We basically exercised all day long! We did a 2 hour sea kayak trip, with rutters and all. That is a lot of work! We went up an estuary to find Seals, lots of birds (i am not interested in them so i forget what they are called) and Otters. We learned a lot about the ecology of the area and how certain things like protecting the harbor seal or closing the power plant impact the local environment and economy. We then went back to the Redwoods for a hike through the big trees. awesome.

Day 5 we drove, a lot. The yellow school bus does pretty good, but not that good. It takes forever to get anywhere!

So did i train you ask? OF COURSE!! Quite modified however. I did get up two days to ride my trainer at 4:30am. This was bad, real bad. The only place to ride was right outside the girls bathrooms/showers. It was level and there was a light. This was actually pretty awesome. i watched the sun come up and the fog lift up through the drippy Redwoods, this help sqelch the pain of being up that early. One day i realized i had a flat tire and no tools with me and no means to get into town that day. So i opted to run. Stupid stupid girl. Being a leader and all i was supposed to keep my charges with me at all times. However, i had 5 asian 10th grade boys ready for a run in the woods. I let them go ahead. However, they missed my lecture about waiting at every T, Y, or other juncture to collect the rest of your group. They took 3 wrong turns. THIS WAS NOT MY FAULT!! however, with my past history, had it been known, i would never have been allowed to take them out on the trails! We ran about 5 miles and returned to camp AFTER the group that was taking a leisurly walk. Oops.

One day i did train in the afternoon and sustained about 14 mosquito bites before i had one of my girls douse me with repelent which promplty slid into my eye balls.

Then today my best pal from forever like high school college and living in her tv room when i first moved to the IE is graduating from Dental school!!
Thats her in the middle, the other one is Robyn. Haley also hooked up Jason's grill!

Parting thoughts

The bus is packed, i found the Ez-Up, i rode my bike today. Actually, today Jason and i went to church and we met Olympic Track Cyclist Johnny B who flipped over the side in 2000. HE was talken to the kids. THis pushed my ride to 1:40 pm perfect for bad-weather training. I did hill repeats at Crafton, where i could hardly see the wash from the top. So now i am happy to head to the coast.

I am most stressed about not racing in Big Bear tomorrow. It is only 45 minutes from my house, and very doable, just not on the docket. I will go through withdrawls of not seeing all my homies for another week.

Dozer had a visit from his little brother! The breeder lives down the street and they send up a loaner from time to time. This one is a male, maybe Posiedon. Hard to believe The Pet was once that small!




So i look silly, but when do i not! Question of the day: IS my tiny pony longer or shorter than James Cross's?
Here is the cut girls (and boys) i even bought "product" with it to keep it healthier!! I also didnt even have to fix it!
Have a delightful week. I will try to keep my post-trip blog short. i might have to skip it altogether because i know there will be a lot of drama!!!

Unwilling Hiatus

The time has come to truly punch the time clock. This coming sunday morning, i will be leaving at 5:30am for a Biology trip up the California coast. I have the dubious distinction of being the co-sophomore class sponsor, yes, i know i am pretty important. This class is going on the annual bio trip, and i just have to go to. This will be my first experience of being the adult chaperone. In the past, i just bothered those types and caused them trouble. I guess this is some sort of rite of passage into teacher adulthood.

The trip will take us up to Monterey, in a yellow school bus (travel time approx. 12 hours) where we will be camping until Friday morning. I love to camp, get dirty, live on the edge. THese children, however, have all been bred in the IE, making them prime candidates for that step-mom to be in the PARENT TRAP. i know we are going whale harpooning, i mean watching. THen we will hit up the aquarium for a special behind the scenes pass and classes. We will wander up to Santa Cruz for some Sea Kayaking and who knows what else. I know that the farthest we will head is San Fransisco for a day at the Exploratorium. Rumor has it that it will be raining sunday through tuesday. awesome.

So i am totally stressed about riding. There is no time in my life to take a week off of training. I wont start running, that is something you do in November, on big piles of fall leaves and twigs. Not when you are prepping for certain events. I have almost bribed them to let me take my road bike and a trainer. This means i will be up at about 4:30am everyday so that i can get in at least an hour on the bike before wake-up call at 6am. I am not sure where exactly i can ride the thing. Probably in the campground bathrooms. At least it is dry and lit. Oh, we also have to use quarters for the showers.

i am stressed to leave the internet behind too. There are so many races, events, blogs, and googles that will be missed! I will have to take an entire day when i get back just to get caught up on things!!

I also lost about 2 pounds, OFF MY HEAD!! I cut off probably 10 inches of hair today. It had been about 11 months since my last cut at SuperCUts, so this time i went to an actual stylist who was shocked at the sheer size of my mane. So no more pig-tail braids or one long braid. But you will still be able to spot me, just look for the Pinata!!

Ameture hour in the IE

I was riding a little bike in the IE the other day. Now this land-locked, dirty-air infested area has only a few mountain biking areas to moderatly speak of without climbing above the smog line. One lines right in the heart of Loma Linda, Hulda Crooks. I have run into many of you there, seen a few creatures, and taken a few falls. This ride however, i encountered a gaggle of extremely ameture riders. I have become accustome to playing catch up, talking less, breathing less, and overall just taking a beating. The case is far and few that i am the most proficient rider on the trail. This day, it was true.

These boys were scantely clad in wife(husband)-beaters, gym shorts, sneakers, and flat pedals. I think there were 6 of them, but they all seemed to be the same carbon copy of the Ken Doll 5'10" dirty blond hair, really straight teeth. I tried my best to pass kindly and circumvent them at all costs. But those of you who ride here know there is only so many trails to take, especially when i was out on my own. I ended up running across them about 5 times. I passed them, again, climbing up Jedi. I asked, are you guys like in some cool club or something?? Poor guy said "uhgh blah huh" so maybe that is a new club?

I let them all climb up, because i did not want to break up their rythem as they were climbing and i was decending in a very small canyon. They regrouped at the top and i instantly became their groupie. COme to find out they are dental students just blowing off steam. They are in John Reths class which meand they are in my Cousin Audrey's class which is like the coolest thing ever!! I asked them what the name of their "club" was, they said big fat losers or really slow guys. But no, these guys are hard core!!! It wasn't that long ago that i stopped, A LOT and whined and got hot and annoyed because the saddle hurt. As long as they just keep pushin it, they will be out at the next Cal State race in no time! Good work boys, or Ken Clones.

SNAKES: Christie mentioned on my previous post that i forgot about the snakes. Here we go. Christie has a HUGE aversion to these reptiles, once she got one stuck in her chain and rear cassette, not cool. As she, Jeremy, and i rode a long San Tim canyon, i glanced down just as my right pedal crassed inches above a coiled up baby rattle snake. Hmm, this will be fun.

We climbed up Oak Glen through Beaumont and as we were lazily pedalling down Bryant towards the Ranger Station, all chaos broke out. Jeremy was up ahead, then Christie and i was about a wheel length behind her. We were talking about who knows what and there was a car to our left. All of a sudden she slams on her brakes and starts to scream. I couldn't go left because then i would be in the side panel of a car. So i just hit her. Straight into the buttocks and then the left handle bar. i glanced through her and her bike to see a GIANT coiled up rattle snake in the road. If we had fallen, it would have been right on him!!! YUCKY!!! I just got the chillies thinking of it. We didn't fall however, and with much apologies, mostly for Jeremy because we were so sorry he had to ride with a bunch of Girlie Girls we continued on.

thats it.

The Big Wheel is Cool Again!

Do you remember the Big wheel phenomena of our childhood? The over-sized hard plastic wheels that were saudered to basically a little cart, which are all still sitting in trash dumps across the country due to their extreme eco-unfriendliness? Well they are back. However, this time they are cool, sleek, land lovers that seem to push the rider over the rocks and ruts smoother than ever before...THE 29er!!!

So i asked someone if there are any girlies racing these bohemeths. Probably not due to the "average" small size of the female racer and their need for women specific design. For us 'larger boned' women, however, the 29er can be an excellent choice for mass race course destruction.

I took one for a spin. Heres the deal. I have been riding a full-suspension sugar for about 3 years now. It also has regular 26 inch wheels and cantilever breaks. Riding a hardtail with disc brakes and HUGE wheels was quite the experience. I felt smoother, faster on the decents, quikcer on the climbs and all around lighter. Also, when i came to a place in the path where the usual thought flashes through my head: "I am going to fall. This will hurt." The big ol' 29er just rolled on by.

So, will you see me on one of these in the future? Who really knows....

RACES: So i totally bailed on my Fontana Cross Country update. HEre it is. I was tired and moderately unmotivated. I cam in 5th (goal was top 5) with a few people too close and 4 people too far away. No worries though, i have now implemented a plan...top secret of course!!!

CAN YOU SEE THE PINATA?
Stellar is the only word i can think of to describe the 2006 Jose Ole kits. Well, i could also think of a few more...

Racing on Cinco de Mayo in Fontana made me feel akward as i toted around a giant, moving pinata. There is confetti spots all along the side panels and sleeves, etched in bright, shiny yellow that makes even a bumble bee flee. After the race i realized my sleeve lines were gone only to realize that i had burned THROUGH the jersey, leaving a sports bra tan instead. Now Teri thinks that is neat. I had no idea, so now my back is burned. It reminds of those not-cool tan through bathing suits from 1982.

BLOG EDIT: I totally forgot about this, just remembered, and had to edit because it is so iglarious (Uriah word).

I went for a ride with some *people* the other day. I had ridden with a member of this group about a year ago. At that ride, they thought i talked sooo much that they faked a cramp and sat on the side of the trail so that i could 'talk' my way up the hill. At the reunion ride, they showed up with an iPod which however, made me feel as if i could talk even MORE! I actually laughed, twice, out loud and actually hardly talked at all because i was actually RIDING hard this time. "If I Shut my Mouth I would Beat You." Must remember, conserve your energy!!!! But if you ever want to talk....

Scuffing quickly does not equal running

The girls are running in the gym. I hear this annoying "skuff, skuff squeak, skuff" and notice the amount of upward momentum on their knees is about 3 mm. Not enough to create any cardiovascular development or maintain proper biomechanics for running. This is how i felt on Sundays XC race. Going through the motions, but not getting quite as far or getting there as fast as i should, but that is all good because of this:





Which led to this:



Ultimately leading to this:


I was entirely shocked! I went into the short track (dirt circle) with very low expectations thinking with flashbacks of my sub-par crit experiences. HOwever, racing in the Home Land has HUGE advantages! Being Friday afternoon, i paid, i mean asked, a bunch of my work homies to come take a gander. Katrina and Scott Bennie, Linda and Denny Breeze and Carrie Davais were strategicly placed at the top of the grnarly climb. They yelled, shouted and all but pulled me up the climb. At the decent, where impending doom loomed under every rock and dust pile, Velo Bella Sami sat on a boulder and guided me through it keeping me calm! (This decent FREAKED ME out even on sunday after doing about 28 times!) Once i rounded the home stretch, i was greated by the greater mountain bike community. Racing in SoCal really has its perks. So many of the some guys are at every event, you build quite the support network. The Backbone crew, Veeze and Gary (sinlge speed/marathon freaks) and people i dont even know, banging the fences, cheering at the top of their lungs for me to get it done! In the announcers booth, the usual suspects loomed. Larry Longo and Uncle Greg created the most animated and motivating commentary on the race i think i have ever heard!! They said stuff like "Duerksen's throwing down the gauntlet" and various other things i barely heard. As i rounded the courner, Home Girl Teri screamed, jumped, ran, and yelled as i hammered down the pedals. Jose Ole Thom stood at the bottom of the climb giving the time splits. Super-Throopers dad even whispered to me that the next girl was about 5 feet back.

To say the least, it will be nearly impossible to recreate this race. I performed way beyond what i thought i could do. I moved steadily up from 10th place to 3rd and was able to hang on. On the 4th ot last lap, i was sure i was going to puke and thought how disgusting that would be to come across the line covered with vomit.

So pretty much if you were at that race, you will be coming with me to Vermont, thank you for your support! IFelt so warm and fuzzy after that race, it was really cool.

These things, however, tend to not follow you into the next day and especially not beyond and into another event.... more to come, i do have to work you know...

First Things First...

NUMERO UNO: (In honor of Cino de Mayo) JASON AND I ARE ENGAGED!!! Yes this is old news, as of Wednesday, but so much has been going on! So i guess that means that Dozer and Uriah will be brothers, how cute!

There is not too much of a story, sorry for those of you looking for salacious news! However, i did receive a delightful Mineral or PEARL it is called a "CUPCAKE PEARL" unfortunately, snacks were not included!

I/we/us are very excited to say the least.

No date is set yet, i gotta check that racing schedule!! Seriously...

NMBS update to come plus some pictures!

Total Geek

I am SO the first one to do a Firestone Update! What's up now?!?!

I think i will have to keep this one short. We went, we saw, we conquered...and I DIDN'T BREAK ANYTHING!!!!!!

Alas, placing me at the top of the podium! Unfortunately, nobody ever wants to go to the podium with me, but i promise there were other girls in my cat!!

THE RUN DOWN: First off, Christie opened yet another can and landed herself a 4th place finish 35 seconds back from 2nd! It was really cool to watch things go down on the curvey course. When i was headed into a single track or around a corner, the pros were heading out (meaning there was SEVERAL minutes between) But it was awesome to see my girls and where they were all lined up. All the usual suspects were there: Meggan, Teri, Mandy, Carolyn, Tomorrah, Sami, Amy and then some wild card chicks getting ready for Fontucky.

I thought for sure that i was runnin for 2nd the whole race, but the Sandbagger i thought was ahead was actually a Pro, leaving me in 1st. I managed to lead the experts for the better part of both laps. However, i seem to hit the wall at times. THis is the longest race i have done at 31 miles. I know, you endurance freaks think i am a Powder Puff, but this is a lot to get used to. The pros went off way too fast, it was all i could do to hang onto the very tail end. When i realized I was out in front of the experts, however, that gave me a little extra motivation.

Bev Chaney from Rouring Mouse caught me and worked together for most of the second lap, with me in the lead. We caught up to Velo Bella Pro Sami and we all started to work. Once Bev took the pull however, i realized i couldn't hold on. I think she finished about 30-60 seconds ahead of me, or a bit more, which was fine. She is 40+ thus not a threat. Also, she gave me her cytomax! We came across a giant bull in the trail and i was so afeared i dropped my bottle and kept going! This was right at the start of the 2nd lap, and surely i would have been toast if she hand't hooked me up!

Sami and played yo-yo for a bit, but i just couldn't keep it going. The trail was super rough, like a wash board, and my fork was way too reactive, thus the vibrations were going all through my body. This actually made me really sick to my stomach and it kept sloshing things around. Sami told me to pick it up, but i thought i was just going to throw it up! So i backed off a little knowing i was rolling in with no other experts too close.

In the end, Bev was the only expert ahead of me and I had passed one pro.
Super props to Essence Barton though, she always keeps me on my toes. AS a 14 year old she raced up an age group to be my competition of the day. She is on it, and in the near future, you will be seeing a lot more of this chick!

Firestone was great. The vibe was good, the venue was beautiful, and the course had little to complain about. Finally bike and body decided to unite and bring home a little bling, or shall i say a big glass mug.

Jason celebrated his 26th birthday on Sunday with Uriah and Dozer in tow!

Now the goal is to get tires that are not so HUGE that they rub on the frame, and everything else!

See yall at Fontucky!

RANDOM THOUGHT: Teri Strayer really needs to get a blog. She is quite funny and entertaining, and has A LOT TO TALK ABOUT! Everyone else has some sort of web-momento, so she should too! IF you agree, please make a comment to that affect and we will see if she bites!

In Case You Didn't Know...

THIS IS THE CRANK...The hole down on the right is where the little pedal goes (The explanation is especially for you, Julene)

Me, holding the crank that wouldn't stick, right after the race.

PS: I KNOW I DO NOT MATCH!! PLEASE DO NOT MOCK ME!! i actually think it is funny. Jose Ole hasn't received their Mtn Bike Kits yet, i guess they are a compilation of yellow, purple, and black, so i must pimp the other sponsor HAMMER NUTRITION which only comes in Red. Gotta Love it! They are very comfortable, and thats what it is all about!

Character Building 101

Being in grad schol means i have taken DOZENS of classes. However, none of them have truly prepped me for the battles on the race course. I feel like a freshman whose hazing just wont let up. Like i am the total loser that gets picked on the ENTIRE school year. But, as they say, this too, shall pass.

FIRST OFF: The weekend painted teh backdrop for success. Nice cool weather with a hint of mist in the air. A delighful Saturday, and i even made homemade apple pie. I was on time to everything Sunday with more than enough food and beverages. JOSE OLE THOM was at BONELLI with an EZ-Up, food, water, Gu, trainers, and support. Christie and I calmly and methodically prepared for all the fun.

For those of you who dont know, as an expert 19-29 we start with pro women and expert 30-39. In my position, you would like to fend off as many of the experts as possible, and stay with at least the tail end of the pro field. The race started FAST, but that was fine! I was chasing the pros, with only one expert ahead of me for quite some time! I ended up ahead of one pro and Teri for a moment, but i knew that wouldn't last. She was pushin' the big ring up a hill climb! ACtually, it was pushing her and they were duken it out! In a few minutes she was right back out in front to lead me through the water crossing, and the mud.

At the start of the second lap, i felt excelent! I had left the heart rate monitor at home and my computer wasnt even working, so i was just in a groove.

I was climbing up by Raging Waters when i thought my left pedal was loose. No, that wasn't the pedal that was THE ENTIRE CRANK!!!!!!! I looked down in utter dismay. Foot and shoe still stuck in the pedal standing ON THE CRANK on THE GROUND! I have these SUPER COOL cranks that connect through the bottom bracket so the right crank promptly took a dive into the dirt. I started to freak out. Fortunately, this all happend RIGHT NEXT Chris Sharp from Backbone Racing! I owe this guy big time! He "showed" me how to put it back together and pushed me up the hill. I knew this wouldnt last. Most of the women had passed me by (flashbacks of chainsuck at Sagebrush) so i knew i was done. However, the only other girl in my category hadn't passed me in the 5 minutes i was hanging out, there was hope to hang onto first place.

Joking! What a joke! The cranks promplty fell off. Fortunately, it was right by the hike-a-bike where everyone was running/pushing/walking, so i kept my pace. Here is where i encountered a young man walking down the trail with a broken chain. He was done he said. I looked at him and laughed, "are you serious? I dont have any pedals man! I can NOT DNF! I see no blood and not a single BONE STICKING OUT! You are fine, got on the donkey and move it!" It worked! In about 4 minutes, we were pushing bikes side by side. Aw. During this time, i moved into 2nd place. Oh well.

This was a shockingly enjoyable adventure. The amount of comments and possitive discussion (instead of volitile banter) I shared with the men will always be remembered. I could kick my right crank in with my heel, put my left food on my frame, and pedal with my right leg up some stuff, down everything, and on the flats. This was neither glamorous nor fun, yet very effective.

As i was leaning into emotional turmoil, i thought about an excerp from a book i was reading Friday that is about to come out. Remember that movie ALIVE about the Rugby team that got stuck in the Andes? Well, the guy who walked out to get them rescued after they had eaten most of the dead, has written a recount of his experience. One line stuck out in particular: "Do not cry. Tears waste salt. You will need salt to survive." Once again, my non-huge issues put into perspective and a great rational put to use. Do not waste your energy or your reserves! You have to focuse so you can solve your problem, not wallow in it.

At the bottom of the big climb, i encountered some of my favorites. Of course i do not know their names, but i see them everywhere and we are all pals! They are the crazy Single Speed Guys so when they saw with no cranks attached, they just laughed and laughed and told me to "get 'er done!"

I kept it together until i saw the finish line through the trees. I came out onto the road and there were Christie and Teri waited with worried looks and understanding eyes. I knew i could have done it, been right in there, but it was not meant to be. As i got closer to the line, pedaling my one little leg as hard as i could, i heard Longo say "Does anyone have a crank?" This pulled those saltless tears out and they started streaming down my face, oh what might have been. Then i got over it. When you think about it, it is funny. Just all those emotions and endorphines piled in there, i just couldn't take it!

SLight reality check however. Remember back at Sea Otter when i flatted and found perspective while sitting in the dirt 100 yards up from an ambulance picking up some guys? Well as i was one-legging the last 300 yards with my right leg, a guy with a prosthetic left leg rode by me. What a coincidence, eye opener, and life lesson in such a short moment!

THE GOOD: Teri, Christie, and Meggan truly showed their "upperclassman" support and understanding. I know they have all been there, more than they would like to think about.

Also, CHRISTIE opened it up for a 3rd place finish!!!! Now thats HUGE!!!!

All in all, it was a great day. i was where i needed to be, i broke something, i had a good time, and i finished! From now on, don't forget to tighten YO BOLTS!!!!! (Thank you, mechanic, for the eloquence!)

Aw, MAN!

MY BIKE IS DIRTY and broken!! The details of which i am not at the liberty to share. They are both the result of some race preriding on a specific course that, as of sunday, sucks. But if i were to state the ins and outs of said course, people may find out what is really wrong with it which in turn could benefit them on the actual race, thus acting against me. I will divulge my secrets after the fact.

In the meantime, i have to go get a tooth on my chainring bent back to where it should be. Little monster.

SUPER BUSY DAY: Kidding! Here at school we are adminstering the CAT6 tests. Since i have no classroom, i am *stuck* not proctoring any tests. Today, i walked from class to class taking hot lunch count. We are having spaghetti today. Too many carbs for me....Then i had to help in a classroom where the sub could not figure out how to select a specific scene on Romeo and Juliet. good thing he didnt play #13 instead of #14, the 9th graders would have been subjected to a bare butt....

Then i put some jerseys in the dryer and now i am about to fail some girls on yesterdays mile. It took them 19:38 minutes!!! I cant WALK it that slow.

I may actually go for a little road ride today. I will choose to fly solo while trying to avoid the Tuesday Nigh National Championships where racers/riders/tuesday night warriors from all over the world, no, Inland Empire, come to throw down. Ok, so i cant talk any smack because i have only seen them once, heard of them a billion times though, usually with some funny story or quarter second wins on a Sunset hill climb.

Picture Show

WEEKEND RE-CAP:

I have no control over these boys! They were like this when i met them!
This is what Dozer was doing when I left, and came back. Plus, he was pimping his new Collar. The spikes actually hurt and they keep gauging out my leg wounds.
Washing mtn style: Since my house is LITERALLY smaller than a hotel room, there is no washer or dryer. Thus, if it really needs to be cleaned, pull out the bucket. Teri - I bought OxiClean, a lot of it. The socks shockingly came out white, but there are mud splatters stuck to Jose's face on my jersey!!!

SHORT TRACK: This is what i missed out on Saturday, and the truth is, this was a nice spot.

The Joy (UN)Luck Club

SEA OTTER CLASSIC
What a bunch of craziness!!! First off, there were a ton of high points. I was so excited, and borderline emotional, to see all the local girls lined up for the pro XC race sunday. There they were, all in a little gaggle. Carolyn, Christie, Mandy, Meggan, Teri, Chrissy it has been and i know will be exciting to see what these girls are capable of! I also saw Matt heading off into the drizzle with the pro men!

The Trip: Went smoothly! Spent the night in SLO with the HAMRICKS and the Grandparents were there too! I was actually driving the JEEP it is red incase you forgot. Come to find out it needed over a QUART of oil! YOu would think that when those loosers were "tinkering" with the engine for eight weeks and a day they would have put some oil in it. But they didnt.

FRIDAY:
Jason and Uriah hit up the Aquarium in search of the Octopus as i scrambled in normal form to find Christie, Teri, Mandy and Heather for a little XC preride. It was good un-clean fun due to the mud etc. For the most part, a normal day.

SATURDAY:
To start the off nicely, i forgot my helmet at the hotel. Of course!! While driving into the hotel driveway, there was a BMW infront of the Jeep. They proceeded to back straight out of the driveway and into the front of the JEEP. NO WAY! I was livid. I think i was a bit mean to the poor fellow. His tail light was shattered and the sturdy jeep bumper just scratched. Not a good way to start a race day though.

This would have been my first short track race. It was not to be. This is my first, ever, DNS this one actually made me cry. I was so frustrated and upset. I got there when they were about 3/4 way through their first lap. I went up to Longo and asked if those were truly my girls, and yes indeed they were. After much self discussion i realized it would be ok. It was super, out of control muddy, and i was over it. So i took Jason and Uriah Sea Kayaking. While they went to play in the sun, i went to jump on my trainer. This was not to be either. I misplaced an intregal portion of the trainer, and had to resort to a road ride in a town i have never been in. Fantastic. Almost every main road ended up in a tunnel or on HWY 1 or 68. Very awkward indeed.

SUNDAY: The big day. You see, i have been prepping for this season. I have been thinking of the looming 40 mile race at Sea Otter and what a challenge it will be, and how great it would be. This was, infact, not to be. As i was heading towards the start line, *someone* said, as they stood with a group of people: "So Joy, are you going to start this race today?" It was all I could do to restrain myself from the well over-due verbal assault that should have answered that question. Do they really think i CHOSE not to start stxc? Instead, i resorted to my snottiest 8th grade catfight voice and just yelled "NO, im not gonna start." Theory 854: Stupid questions deserve stupid answers, or worse.

Since i am starting a season of first, as before stated, i decided to have my first ever flat in a race. Ever. I think i was protected by some schroud last year that worded off all ill-fate as i raced. This year, that shroud has been tossed to the wind. Or as Meggan says, were all just getting so strong, we keep breaking things.

I was in the perfect spot. I was with key people who have handed it to me in the past, i felt good, and i knew i had a LONG ways to go. Then "poof" there it went. I HAD to look at this flat in perspective. About 100 yards behind me there was an ambulance taking some semi-pro or expert men out. This was just a flat and i can totally deal. Although about 9 girls passed me, i knew i could catch a good chunk of them, assuming that i was going to get stronger as the race went on.

Thus began the Monty Python movie that was never, and will never, be released. I was flying solo now, except for the phantom tandem. These guys were crazy. Riding through the boggy forest into thick trenches of mud and quagmire, reminding me of Pilgrims Progress, then python these guys kept me optimistic. They were dressed totally in black and riding a single speed. They would just appear through a thicket in the fog, then promptly fall in the mud. Rumor has it that they were wearing dresses earlier that day. I could hear them yelling, laughing, runny, and lugging behind me. We played cat and mouse for the better part of the race. They kept telling me how i would catch up... LIARS!!!! THey should be hung....

While riding the road climb, next to the tandem weirdos, we were split, swarmed and engulfed by pro men. Oh, what a feeling. I told them that it was the highlight of my day and they could stay a bit longer if they needed anything, at all. I actually got a few to laugh. Point for me. FRom then on, i played a little game Christie would call 'name that tune' but i played 'name that jersey.' Since i do my fair share or stalking, ok, i do enough for a small town, i know who these guys are. Wells grunted really weird when he went by, that Bishop guys bike needed some serious lube, and the Fisher boys ALL talked to me. Also, Leslie Tomlison talked to me from the side of a climb. If you dont know who she is, try www.google.com, duh. you way even find youself there!!

So the lap is almost over. Much longer than anticipated, but great things happened. I actually PASSED girls who were riding and normal (usually it is people with broken bikes or bodies) on the descents. I passed Jason and Uriah and yelled at them because they wouldnt give me my water bottle, then i realized, it was all about to hit the fan.

I GOT PULLED. Alot of things crossed my mind. Why didnt i just DNF like an hour ago? WHy didnt anyone tell us there was a time cut? What happens to my time? Am i that worthless? Joking on the last one, totally. A lot of girls got pulled, and were not stoked. I went out to race 42 miles, so you kinda ride conservatively on the first lap.It was just a huge let down. So much money spent to get there and i am not even on any sort of results list. I went there to race a super long, hard race, and didnt.

But you know, next week theres some race type thing in Bonelli so maybe that will be a better day. I will use my super duper flat fixer skills to the full, i will remember to use the good lines while riding through mud, and most of the time there are no good lines, so RUN. I will also remember that it is just a race, we have good ones and bad ones. And sometimes, other people just have more control and power than i do. i hate that the most, really. If i threw my race, so be it. But to have other people tell im out, thats a tough one.

Truth of the matter, everyone had trials this weekend. Check out Meggan's Blog with fantastic photos and daily updates. Also check Christie out although i am not sure there is a Sea Otter update there yet. One day i will learn how to put links on my site so you guys can check out ALL the bikers on a regular basis!

Some Photos

MY NEPHEW GRIFFYN, WHAT A CHAMP:

RACE FLASHBACK: MAMMOTH NATIONALS - SEPTEMBER This was an awesome day on the bike and a great weekend, the perfect thing to focus on before going up to Sea Otter...in the rain.
REDLANDS CLASSIC...CHECK OUT THE NEW COLORS my actual kit should be here in about a month, hopefully!!! But the helmet matches, and that is very important

THE DUMBEST THING I HAVE HEARD:

One of our high school boys went to Costa Rica for spring break. He got stung by a Sting Ray. He also already got stung by a one in Laguna at our school picnic day. Coincidence. I guess some local Costarican put a banana on his foot. THis banana came STRAIGHT out of a piping hot FRYING PAN. the spot on his foot from the Ray is very small. The 2nd Degree burn on his foot is huge.

LOW POINT:

I go to grad school. Enough said there, but sometimes the people you end up with really arent conducive to what you want to be getting done. Nobody wants to drive to Riverside after a long day with children to sit in a class of teachers-to-be that lament about Shakespeare and tuition costs, literally. I got stuck next to the only other PE guy who kept talking about my shoes. Yes i wear these Sauconys to work, no my feet do not get hot, yes they cost a bit of cash. Duh, they are shoes, you should not teach PE in anything else. He also wanted me to give him $70 for the book that he would buy sometime for me, although i needed it right then, not at class today, but he really wanted me to give him the money. Like i walk around with that kind of cash.

The jeep is SUPPOSED to be done today, on its 8 week anniversary of being GONE. we will see how that ends up, and the ulcer it has created for me...

Sea you all at Sea Otter!

"HOLY PATELLA!!"

Anatomy was one of my favorite college courses. My favorite bone in the body is the left lateral maleolus you know that knot on the outside of your ankle. My second favorite, however, is the PATELLA. I used to take great enjoyment mocking my students health papers and where they "thought" this bone was located.

The following is a tale of my left patella, with of course many tangents.

SAFARI PRE-RIDE: NO 'GAME' TO BE FOUND
Things were crazy. Christie took a wild burm and stomped out in a way in which she thought she could have created a hair-line fracture. But since there was no bone sticking out or blood gushing, i said she was fine. But it actually really did hurt a lot and became a big worry.

I, on the other hand, was out of control. I had a pretty placid season last year, with the main issue being me running into a post at the Fall Classic. I made up for it big time.

The Mechanic pimped my ride so well, i endo'ed 4 times. Really. Those brakes work really well. I guess that is what i was missing out on last year. But one of those adventures was on a huge rock and the only thing that hit it was my left patella I created a hole in my leg warmers, which when i finally took them off, were glued to my leg with blood. There was also fragments of my flesh stuck to the warmers. Cool.

Second incident of pain, actually emotional pain. Teri, Jay, Christie and I all stopped to do something. I came up next to Teri and needed to stop. Out of the corner of my little little eye, I spied a post. But in actuality, it was one of those brown forest service posts that bends ALL the way to the ground. So of course me and the Sugar followed in rare form. Which landed me on my left side, thus engaging my CO2 cartridge, dispelling a lot of gas. It was bad, very bad.

When i thought things couldnt go any farther south, we came to a spot that needed practice. Everyone was watching, good clue to hike it. I got to the middle and promptly fell to the right....on....rusty barbwire fence and post i sustained 3 puncture wounds which quickly changed the orange of my shorts to brownish red. The bruise is quite fantastic. I then began to wail and ask if any one had a booster or knew exactly WHAT tetnous would look like, as i was dying. but today, my dentist (yes, dentist) said i would be ok. If i had lock-jaw, it would have already hit....

THE RACE: i know so much more to go over...The debate started saturday afternoon, whether or not the experts would do the long course. By the time we got to the line with the pro women, Spiegle was yelling at us to never complain to him or say a word about choosing the long course. And we didnt. But then, as i was plodding back at the end of the race, i contemplated my horrid time, what if Tom looked at it and said thats it, from now on, those lazy experts will race the medium. It would be all my fault.

I started super strong on the hill climb. I was in there, where i needed to be, middle of the pack. But once i hit the single track, my luck turned or my karma came to visit. I dropped my chain 8 times, no joke. Those cables stretched out sooooo fast and the multiple wrecks the day before left there mark. Every time i dropped the chain, some girl passed me. This all happened on the single track where time and possition was paramount. This is also where all the grid-lock occurred. The sport men always do catch me, the leaders are great. Quick and to the point and polite. I despise the middle of the pack sport men. They are the bain of my racing existance. I had altercations with at least 15 of them. We shared words, they cut me off, i dropped my chain infront of them and they cursed. I want to ask them, "so are racing for 15th or 16th place? Neat, im racing for 2nd.!"They made me so excessively angry, added to the severe mechanicals, i was a head case. I kept it up though and made it to Los Pinos Climb. I love to climb. I enjoyed this horrid part of the race. I passed an expert guy!! But then i looked back and he was WALKING HIS BIKE UP THE ROAD. I also passed a semi-pro who was riding out on a flat. Hey, whatever makes you feel good about yourself.

At about the halfway point, i totally realized i was in last place. I havent really been there before, and i was not comfortable with it at all. All the experts passed me and the girl who beat me had me by 24 minutes. However, she is a Royal Sandbagger she would have come in 3rd out of all the pro's. She pushed Christie and wouldn't even look at me or go on the podium. Drama queen.

It ends up i was not last! There was another girl in my category who came in 30 minutes after me!! I sure hope she is ok. I dont even know what you could do out there for that long, build a wigwam or something...

The Jose Ole stuff has way too much white on it. I am supposed to wear these socks, totally white. They are mostly brown now. I think i will just allow them to assume that color for the rest of the season, to remind of the pain of sunday. I would also like to secure a sponsorship with OxyClean

This was hands-down the hardest race i have ever done. I have never had mechanicals before. I have never been tested this much. I told you this would be the season of firsts. All the races i did last year pale in comparisson to what i am up against this season.

But it will be good. I have a lot of support and a lot of mentors that have all been there before and know the pain and the yo-yo of emotions and performance.

Just another week and another race to get ready for. And to get that bike working right again. And, perhaps, some clean socks.

Off to the Races

The day has finally come - the season shall begin. With much anticipation, i pack my gear and spit-shine my Sugar. My OCD behavior returns as I pack Tupperware after Tupperware with cottage cheese and veggies; plain yogurt and spices; an omlette; some pre-cooked oatmeal. You see, we are headed to the Boonies, bring your-own-everything race, Sagebrush Safari it sounds so romantic, so adventerous. I have never been to this venue, thus starting off the Season of Firsts the first Cal State race, the series that runs all the way through October. This race will also act as a warm-up and jitter-buster for the Ominous Sea Otter next weekend.

To start things off with confidence, i PIMPED-MY-RIDE!! I got an assortment of upgrades from SRAM X.O shifters to a new bottle cage. I am sure this will allow me at least 30 seconds of an edge. Then it will all be up to me. Thanx to the mechanic...

NEW OUTFIT:
With a new season also comes new KITS. Since i was late to re-join Team Jose Ole, my kit will also be late. ETA is Fontana Nationals, but you never really know with these things. Until then, i will sport the old Orange or a loaner-mens Medium jersey and stellar black shorts!! I just spent too much time trying to upload some photos from the Redlands Classic, but photoblogger is rebelling against me...next time.

I was also going to post some photos of Dozer, of course!! He has finally grown large enough to fit into a LEATHER STUDDED collar! You will love it, and be afraid!

Wiggly Nerves

SPRING BREAK: First off, the NUMBER ONE bonus of being a super cool teacher is VACATION!!! I have the whole week to do everything that i havent done since Christmas. Awesome.

NON-TRAINING RIDES: Sometimes i get a bit lax in my understanding of where i am going for a ride. Since i began these crazy group rides, it is all i can do to get into my shorts and arrive on time. SOmetimes i even forget food and the such, rarely will i give any thought as to where we will go.

Saturday morning found me floundering once again to find stuff and follow Christie's wheel. We hit up the Rotary Ride in connection with the Redlands Classic and we picked the 60 miler. I should have known when Jon Reth gave me the look, and the laugh, and said "come on Joy". The rest is ancient history of too tall hills and miles that sent the heart rate up. Like who was the demon who got those private landowners over on that Smiley road to open it up?! Gosh! It was a good ride though, very good.

THE CRIT: The past few days i have had a wiggly stomach. I finally realized that it was due to the fact that i had to race today. I dont really count Boulevard as a race, just a "big training ride with really fast girls i dont know." So the last time i suited up was for the Fall Classic in October.

Today there were some goals:
1.) Warm-up on the trainer: CHECK
2.) Don't get Pulled out of the race: CHECK
3.) Don't let *someone* infront of me: CHECK
4.) Don't eat it: CHECK

However, near the VERY end, we got lapped. I dont care though. LAst year was a disaster of sorts on my part with getting dropped like in the first 100 yards and being pulled and really sucking.

But today, we were the CHASE GROUP! Much better than some alternatives i could think of. Also, as the excitment mounted, the announcer called out that whoever was crossed the line first for the CHASE group on the next lap, got some SNACKS!!! So i had to throw down! I ended up with TWO boxes of CHEETAH BARS!! i was SOOOOO excited. Also, they will make a great replacement for my CHeeto addiction! They sound the same, almost, yet are all natural fruits squished together in a block! Much better than processed cheese! (Christie, i know you are very proud of my improvement)

Christie and Teri Finished with the pack, good girls! Although Bev said she was able to take better pictures of me due to the MUCH smaller size of my group!! Yet another benefit for finishing behind all the crazy girls, more press!

EXCUSE OF THE DAY: "Well i havent ridden my bike in *(insert number here) months, i am just not up to par." Well, as you know, i only ride my bike 3 hours a week, so....

Also, BEWARE the trash talking!! It will almost always bite you, and when it does, that is not cool!!I know, we all do our fair share, but COME ON....

The Binge

I spend my life on the verge of OCD, leading me to binge on many a thing. I consistently forget to purge, however. I have begun eating large amounts of Cheetos in any form. My fav, today, are the Jalapeno Chedder ones, oh yum.

So my newest binge was lifting weights and going to the gym period. Since the days are rainy and long, i get to the gym by 5:30am, ride the bike there, then go to work. Then after work i go back to the gym to throw some weights around, must maintain my muscle status. But i always over do it, i cant get enough or seem to find the effort to stop going and pushing a bit too much.

JEEP: I am not really going to go there, but it has been gone for 6 WEEKS!!! Here is a rundown of what i could have really done with 6 weeks of my life:

Completed 2/3 of a quarter in grad school
Riden my bike from SF to Wash DC and at least half way back. In winter.
Gone through a complete workout cycle or phase in the gym
Most of the summer holiday would have come and gone

You see i have borrowed 4 different cars, two of which have died upon return to their owners. Suspect, i know. Then my hot water heater decided to leak, a lot all over the kitchen carpet. Whoever carpets a kitchen should have terrible things done to them.

Alas, there are lovely things about life. The 4 inches of snow that falls per night.
The fact that i teach pe which means i chat with jr high girls about boys, movies, tv, clothes, you know, all the things i care little about
I also get to play badminton with them and wear shorts, sweatshirts, and sneakers to work. Then on my lunch, i check blogs and the such.

Then there is always the Pet. He has a few extra names:
Snoop Doze
Pup-pup
Pet
Kitten
Creature
Puppy
Dooz
Snooz
Snuggle Bunny
Pupples
Pupples-T
Muckles-B
Muckles
and DOZER
He comes to all of them, freak.
He also SUCKS on his new bed and whines as he sleeps. Sick sick dog. He's got some mama issues!